What am I missing here?

On Thursday this mess should start to get cleared up. But I got more tax nonsense asking for more taxes. I just spoke with them recently and THOUGHT I cleared everything up. I don’t know what these new bills are about, but if I don’t get my visa settled and then a letter sent about my taxes for this coming year, I’m expected to cough up a lot of money for taxes that I am 100% sure that I won’t have to pay for the coming year. But I can’t prove that until I have a copy of the new visa. 

What are up with these taxes?? And you know it’s the end of the year and I just want to enjoy my last lessons and wind down, get everything settled for the year. Everything takes ages in Germany, regardless of what the Germans think. I haven’t even had my kitchen light since March. 

Stop.

Breathe.

The women on Monday almost sent me on my way again to wait further, indefinitely. As if 3 months for a  visa isn’t unreasonable. But then I told her to stop and that wouldn’t work and I had done absolutely everything I needed and planned and budgeted, but it can’t go any further. And I think she understood and she made an appointment for Thursday morning early. All because of typo, saying 3 years instead of 2.

This stress is going to do me in. Did I believe I would get my Visa Monday? No not at all. Thursday. 50-50. If I don’t I’ll tell her to call up all my seniors herself and say that since they can’t be bothered to give me a proper timeline, I now have to cancel a year long course,against my contract, maybe,  at the last minute. Which I’d hate. Guess who looks irresponsible.

I’ll get downright aggressive and nasty on Thursday if I need to. This office has been abusing me since 2009.

Everything has been on hold for 3 months. Nothing has been able to function as it should financially and I have had to keep replanning as this isn’t taken care of.

I asked for Monday off I was so stressed out. My boss didn’t like it, of course not, but gosh darn it, I never would have worked Mondays, HAD I KNOWN that I would still be billing her as self-employed and DIDN’T need to increase my income at all. My boss didn’t understand. I got offended. This isn’t about a work permit this is about trying to jump through all the legal hoops and watch all your options and money taken away from you, and in the end being faced with the exact situation as where you started. I can’t make a situation based on my finances and tax rules and then later end up in the same boat again.

I straight up told me boss that I had I known how everything would be come July, I don’t know that I would have made the same decisions back in April, i.e. another year. And I think she got it.

I cannot believe this. I never ever want to go to this stupid office ever again. I am ready to leave this city as a resident forever.

Were it not for the bf I’d go home.

I can’t even go over the multitude and minutiae of difficulties that this issue has brought about. All I have to say is that things will start going downhill really quickly if I am not officially working for my boss in July and my tax status has changed.

We have a problem when I am calling up a month before my appt. to check if everything is really ok. then after no success, finally getting someone to open my file, and then telling me everything looks good. and then when I go the person looks at it for the first time, insinuates it’s not her problem and tells me to eff off. So even though I’m checking that they are doing they’re job, they’re not and I have to pay for it.

This isn’t clear. I don’t care. It isn’t clear in my head. I’m totally overwhelmed trying to make sure I’m taking all the proper steps and if it doesn’t get sorted out, my summer vacation time won’t happen. And hey guess what I’ve already bought all the tickets.

I’m so offended that after all we’ve been through with this, my boss doesn’t get that if I don’t earn enough money, my plans will change. I might have to move my appt.

The thing is, guess what, this all doesn’t have to work out. The bf told me that about Monday. I mean, come on he has to, but I was sitting there stubbornly saying, nope, nope nope dear, it doesn’t. No one is under any obligation to look out for me except for me.

And you know I’ve got fantastic plans and a decent job, and wonderful support and I’m excited about getting some time off this summer, but none of that matters if this thing that I have been worrying about since January and going to offices all over town for and getting advice about the best way to do things doesn’t get resolved.

I’ve been telling myself every month just to be a little bit more patient and it’ll be over. And it isn’t. 2011 will forever be known as my year of bureaucratic torture and abuse. My life has been on hold. My to-do list has stayed constant for 4 months. That alone is torture.

But I need to stop now seriously. There’s nothing I can do. If I’m screwed, I’m screwed. And I think I’m screwed.

This is not how I planned this entry going.

*SIGH*

Took another bike ride. Didn’t want to actually. But I made myself. It’s too hot for the fitness studio. I was already on my bike in workout clothes with water. At least it gets rid of some of my anger.

The oldies were good today. It was a nice time together.

The night before I chatted with my dad and that helped both of us, but that feeling disappeared with the tax letters I got today. (Is it what I supposedly just paid, or is this something new? Also how the hell am I going to explain my new status to them in German!!!)

My bike ride was nice in the sun. I made my favorite meal, Gemista for the first time ever, more or less successfully.

It’s rained and cooled off the heat. Also tomorrow. I will have very little work. Just spending time together with my class.

But I won’t enjoy any of it. I will just be thinking about Thursday and worrying about what else I need to take care of before summer vacation. Even if I get this visa I’ll be hard pressed to do the other bits and prob the bf will have to look into some things while I’m in Greece.

So now I’m going to stop and trying to distract myself and read and fall asleep and hope that one day this will be behind me.

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